[If you want: scroll to the bottom of this post and click play to the song I attached and continue reading while having the song in the background...just a tip]
- Pink stands for me, because in Romanian and Hungarian the meaning of my name is the pink color [rozsa(szin- HU), roz (RO)] and because it's also a color which is associated to girls and femininity. It's also interesting, because the children from the kindergarten call me Roz, exactly as the color itself.
- The blue color stands for God, who surrounds my heart with love. While looking it up on the internet I found that "the color blue in many cultures is significant in religious beliefs, brings peace, or is believed to keep the bad spirits away." (source: Color meaning)
- The color red signifies Jesus' love, that united mere humans to Himself through shedding of His blood on the cross.
- What you can see with your eyes in the painting is an intertwining of two colors: pink and blue. God told me that it symbolizes His coming into my heart and starting to change it into His. Intruding slowly until my walls of resistance crack and I give it all to Him.
After starting the new year a friend of mine had seen a picture for me. It was a shape of a heart made of metal or forged iron. Two hands of light turned the shapes outward, something like this but a heart shape ( ) --> ) ( A voice said: "It's time to turn this love outwards." This year is the time to move from "my wonderful relationship with Jesus" to a "shared" spiritual relationship in faith... moving from me-and-Jesus-only type of faith to me-and-Jesus-and-people. I don't know what that means practically in my life, but He knows and He'll guide me. This empowered the fact that He has my heart in mind this year, in a special way, because I know He always is after our hearts. But the work He wants to do this year is very different, I know it.
As I was entering 2018 I felt really strongly that God wants to bring restoration to my heart. I was asked by someone what do I say goodbye to and what do I say hello to. That put me a little bit on edge because I haven't thought about it. After a few minutes of thought instantly I knew I'm saying "goodbye" to all the plans, fantasy and dreams I had in my mind for my future and I'm saying "hello" to the unknown. I felt like God was calling me into the ocean of unknown... deeper and further. He promises to give me back what has been lost. Crooked ways will be made straight. I read a blog post from Danny Silk, who wrote about the this year and he said:
When our heart is healthy and thriving, courage flows from us. We act like powerful people who step through our fear and tackle challenges to protect and pursue what we love. But when our heart is sick and wounded, courage seems tough to find. We end up living in retreat mode, sacrificing a life of hope, dreams, and risk for a life of survival.
After this, our community had a very good course about wholeness and whole-heartedness by two anointed, sweet, elderly couple. I've learned a lot of my heart from them. Rejection hurts the heart and can cause me to believe a lie of the enemy, which he uses to form a stronghold in me. Why all this matters? It's because those strongholds can limit my walk with God. And my walk with God is the most important thing in my life. I've also learned that it is good to cut every unhealthy emotional soul tie I had in my life. There are lies (that the cross isn't enough or that my value comes from what I do or what other's opinion is about me) which we have to face and declare the truth instead. God chose us not because we were the best, but because of His grace, faithfulness and love only.
did not choose you and lavish his love on you because you were larger or greater than other nations, for you were the smallest of all nations! It was simply because the Lord loves you, and because he was keeping the oath he had sworn to your ancestors. That is why the Lord rescued you with such amazing power from your slavery under Pharaoh in Egypt. Understand, therefore, that the Lord
your God is indeed God. He is the faithful God who keeps his covenant
for a thousand generations and constantly loves those who
love him and obey his commands." (Deuteronomy 7:7-9 NLT)
Another thing I've learned is that my heart has a brain, which is more powerful than my mind in my head. My mind can know the truth about something, but my heart has to believe it and activate it by walking it out by the renewing of my mind. If I change the way I think, I will change the way I feel, which changes the way I act. That's how even my life changes, because my heart wins out every time.
"So above all, guard the affections of your heart, for they affect all that you are. Pay attention to the welfare of your innermost being, for from there flows the wellspring of life." (Proverbs 4:23 TPT)
He is the Author and Finisher of my heart and faith, in Whom I find everything. In Him I live, move and find my delight. I hope I'm ready for what He has in store for me. God reminded me through the following song that He wants my whole heart. He reminded me of our close relationship when I first said "YES" to Him and was on fire for Him! I'm opening my heart to Him and I'm excited for our journey from this day on.
While I was thinking about and pondering on how this year will be one of restoration, I opened my inbox and found an email with this exact title: Restoration in 2018. I couldn't believe my eyes, but that's how I knew that God really has restoration in mind for me this year. Here's a part of what was in the email:
I will restore you. Do not be afraid to follow Me into the unknown, for I am the one who leads you on and restores your life. I have placed within you My glorious treasure, and I care for you. This year will be a year of restoration in your life. You will end this coming year restored in My love, strengthened in My grace, and surrounded with songs of joy. I say to you, I will restore you and provide for you in ways that will reveal My heart of love. My mercy brings gifts and surprises and supplies all that you need. There will always be provision for your needs, and in My mercy I will reveal where you can find Me, for this will be the season of abundant supply for every need you have.
I will restore your mind and your heart as you come before Me. Crooked things will be made straight within you. For everything I do for you I do inside your heart, healing your spirit and soothing your soul. Come and find My heart and I will restore your heart.
The hunger I give you will bring you deeper into My grace and My love for you. I will restore you and your dreams. Those desires within you for completion and to touch the lives of others, I will fulfill. Promises made are promises kept. This day begins a new season of dreams fulfilled. You will laugh with joy when promises are fulfilled and your impossibility removed. And you will see that My ways are perfect.
Isn't this amazing?! GOD IS AMAZING and He showed me how interested He is in the well-being of my heart. All of this showed me how much He cares and loves me. This year is about my heart colliding with His heart! Exciting...