Even in times of trouble I have a joyful confidence, knowing that my pressures will develop in me patient endurance. And patient endurance will refine my character, and proven character leads me back to hope. And this hope is not a disappointing fantasy, because I can now experience the endless love of God cascading into my heart through the Holy Spirit who lives in me! [Romans 5:3-5 made personal by me] TPT
These past days I've been going through some deep stuff with God. Starting at being hopeless and ending in being full of hope, faith and love for Him. He told me that He chose me to be close to Him and asked me frankly: "Have you grown weary with your journey?" My answer was sad, honest, and I was crying out: "Yes, everything looks so hopeless around me! I want to see all those great things I've been dreaming with You! I want to see the fruits of my investment and faithfulness! It hurts so much to be wandering around again and again seeing the same turning points, as if I'm blocked in a cycle." What did He do after hearing this?
He held me close and said to take heart, because He'll encourage me. He didn't withdrew further, but came closer and whispered that He has watched as I passed through this difficult season and knows that I have been drained of power and perseverance. He started calling my name and drawing me closer, yet closer to Him! He promised to give me divine power as I love, wait upon and yield to Him. He promised to encourage me and strengthen me in His love. My friends, I just want to tell you that the moments we spend with God are genuinely His delight. We were meant to walk constantly in His presence, that's why we were created. We weren't made for going through circles of brokenness and cycles of shame. Our quiet times are His treasure, because then He can give us His heart and share His strength with us. I really like how Steffany Gretzinger said that worship is the place where we return, reconnect and remember THAT intimacy we had in the garden of Eden, knowing one another fully, staying close, walking near and telling Him how much we love Him. Listen to her speak about this by clicking here.
There is not one moment of my life where God isn't present with me, ready to refresh my soul, willing to overwhelm me with the knowledge of Himself. He knows me perfectly and He calls me beautiful, His own. Living on this earth and comparing myself constantly made me doubt that lots of times, but I think the time has come to believe Him and take Him at His word... and... live conform them. I am greatly loved by Him and I won't go back, never ever... I will stay steadfast and I will keep Him as my flame that will burn within me, keeping my love secure, strong and passionate toward Him. I am free to soar! I know His love will never diminish for me and His decision will never weaken to make me stand pure in His grace.
Encouraging me this way I realized that He is the God of battles who has won the victory for me and even when I feel weak and hopeless, He will make me strong and hopeful. The secret of His strength and faithfulness is His love without an end that is given to me. I won't be weary any longer, but taking living water from the fountain of His hope, that will never run dry. As He encouraged me I was crying and laughing at the same moment... crying for all those things I've went through and laughing for knowing there's glory waiting for me in the future. I never went through such an experience, but there's always a first time ^_^
Here's a song I've been singing in this season and which has reached down deep inside of me:
Till all I know is I’ve been found by love